Let me start off by saying that taking Natalie to the Dr. is like trying to take a gorilla to the vet. Not a very fun time…….and of course I was the lucky one who got to do the job. The bad thing is that when you take your child to the dr. you tend to forget how bad the last time was. I vaguely remember saying “I’m never doing this again! I’m gonna beat her butt! Why me?!” But vaguely………..It couldn’t be that bad………….or could it?
The day started off pretty good. We got up and got dressed…..Natalie was excited that she was actually getting to go somewhere. You see, Naty has been quarantined for about a month now and every time we start to go somewhere she is very heartbroken when she realizes that sadly she can’t go.
The trip was pretty uneventful on the way to the dr. Of course she wants this and that and of course this and that have to be in places that I can’t reach, especially going down the road. So half the trip was spent with her arguing with me on which magazine she wanted to read. We arrive to the dr. just in time and the good Lord blesses us with a close parking space (which doesn’t happen very often). When we walk in, there is no one in the waiting room which is great because with Naty having surgery on Wednesday I didn’t want her catching anything. There’s always some child who is running around wiping his nose and rubbing it on the chairs, or loves to come up to your child and touch every hair on his or hers head. While we were sitting there waiting, there was a couple of families that came in and sat down waiting for their dr. I was praying the whole time that their child wasn’t “one of those”. They finally called us back and Naty grabs her pocketbook and jacket and follows the nurse to the room. All the nurses are happy to see her because they just adore her. I mean……..who wouldn’t?? They brought her out to weigh her and check her pulse and she was just so grown up. You could see the accomplished look in her face that said “Look what I did!” While sitting in the room, Naty had to get out my wallet full of pictures and spread them out on the table. This is a ritual for her. I honestly think it calms her. After going through every picture and discussing who was in them, the Dr. made her presence. You could see the hesitation in Naty’s eyes but she made a conscious effort to act like a big girl. The Dr. checks her lungs and her nose and throat and informs me that she just has allergy problems. This is very reassuring for us considering that this visit was the deciding factor on surgery or no surgery. She tells me that she is fully confident that she would do great for surgery. We decide to go ahead and put her on amoxicillin just as a precautionary measure.
Upon leaving the room, Naty starts pointing to her chest. I just grin and try to shoo her forward but Natalie was very persistent. She started getting louder and pounding at her chest. Of course I’m trying to rack my brain to figure out what she is wanting when the Dr says “You think she wants a sticker?" That’s brilliant! That’s exactly what she’s wanting! The Dr. hands her a few stickers and Natalie looks like she’s on top of the world. She gives us a HUGE grin and proudly puts her stickers in her pocketbook.
Whew, I thought leaving the Dr.’s office. This turned out to be a great visit. No tears. No whimpers. No hitting. Just a great day!
Talk about speaking too soon……………..
As we were about to turn the corner toward the car, she decides she wants to go into the parking deck. I’m not really sure what her plan was, but she knew that’s what she wanted to do. So what do you think she does when I try to guide her to the car? She drops to her knees and plants herself on the ground. All I could think of was how I didn’t want her to get her pants dirty, so I’m holding her up by her arms and looking around trying to catch “those” glimpses from other parents. Just as she’s about to go flying, I pretty much have to throw her in the seat……………her fault. She was not about to lose this battle yet though. She starts acting like she’s having a convulsion and I have to hold her belly down in order to buckle her in. She makes one final swipe and ends up clawing me on the chin…………At this point I’m wondering how many cameras are pointed at my car. How fast do you think the cops would get to me after they catch me beating her on camera. Instead of acting on this thought though, I calmly shut the door and walk around to the driver’s side. At this point my anger is seething inside of me and wishing for an escape but………..the good Lord is keeping it at bay. I back out and start to drive off, the whole time Naty is in the back seat screaming her head off and cursing me for all it’s worth. Even though Natalie is not able to say much right now, I knew EXACTLY what she was telling me. Her hands were moving every which way and she was shaking that curly head of hers and just screaming like she was giving me down the road.
After about 20 minutes of this behavior she remembers her sucker in her pocketbook that the receptionist had given her. I breathe a sigh of relief when she puts her energy into the sucker. But not for long…………she suddenly remembers that I am such an evil mother and takes her sucker out to start screaming at me some more. All of a sudden……….I felt something hit my head. Now what do you think that was??? The dreaded sucker!! She had thrown the sucker at me and of course of all places to hit it lands in my hair. I couldn’t believe it! I didn’t know whether to laugh or turn around and beat her tail. I instead pried it out of my hair and calmly rolled the window down and tossed it out. Littering, I know. Of course after I threw her sucker out the window she continued to give me down the road.
Ahhhh, the joys of motherhood.
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